I opened the refrigerator this morning and saw that the milk expires on September 14th. I thought, ‘oh, I should probably drink this soon… the expiry dates are always a few days off.’ Then it hit me that I was going to be gone by then. I’ll be across the Atlantic when the milk in the refrigerator expires.
It’s a rather small thing to be hung up on, but it made me realize the true gravity of my choice to leave for Scotland.
Choices always have two sides, what you chose and what you do not chose. Some choices are straightforward. Those choices have a clear good decision and a clear bad decision. For instance, I chose not to eat the whole bowl of candy so that I would not get sick. However, I’ve learned that not all choices are so black and white. A lot of them are grey. A lot of choices have two, maybe even three, good options.
Since graduation, I could feel myself drifting farther away from the choices I could have made. Every day closer to September 9th, I see two very distinctive paths – one of staying and one of going.
By making the choice to go, I gave up the path to stay. Every day the path I gave up continues to fade. And, it is sad. I see the path my life could have taken disappear. I am sorry that I could not travel both.
However, just because I am sorry does not mean that, if I could, I would take back my decision.
I needed to make the choice to go. By going, I will open so many doors that I thought were locked forever. I will be able to experience so many new things and gain a new world perspective. I made the choice to go for myself. Maybe, making that choice was selfish, but at this moment, in this time, I need to be selfish.
I have never wanted anything as much as I want to become an archaeologist. And because, nothing in life comes free, I have to be willinging to give up something of equal value to achieve that dream.
I will miss my life here, to say that is an understatement. I have had one of the best summers in my life. I have spent this summer with some of the best people that I have ever met. I will miss each one of them dearly.
But, if I never make a hard decision in my life, then what is it worth?
And so, maybe the milk in the refrigerator expires September 14th. But, Freshers Week also begins September 14th.
You make me sad. I drank some of that milk this morning. HaHa. Love you kiddo
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